The Best Jokes for Your Christmas Crackers
You can’t beat Christmas cracker jokes at Christmas. Christmas is just not Christmas without a bad, cheesy one-liner joke. You’ll find them in your Christmas cracker or hear them from Uncle Dave trying to be funny.
And you know 9 times out of 10 they will receive an over-exaggerated roll. But that’s all part of the fun.
Arguably, these are the funniest Christmas jokes and you are likely to find them in your cracker on Christmas Day. So, before you reach for the Turkey and mince pies, get into the festive spirit and celebrate with these Christmas cracker jokes.
Whether you’re looking for cheesy jokes or the funniest, silly jokes, we have them all. These all come with a bad joke warning and don’t say we didn’t warn you!
Best Christmas Cracker Jokes
Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?
A mince spy
What do you call a blind reindeer?
No-eye deer
Why couldn’t the skeleton go to the Christmas party?
He had no body to go with
Who delivers presents to cats?
Santa Paws!
What do snowmen eat for dinner?
Iceburgers
Why are Christmas trees very bad at knitting?
Because they always drop their needles
What happened to the man who stole an advent calendar?
He got 25 days
What do you call an old snowman?
Water
What do you call Father Christmas on the beach?
Sandy Claus!
What does Santa suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney?
Claustrophobia
What kind of music do elves love the most?
Wrap
What does Santa use to bake cakes?
Elf-raising flour
What do snowmen wear on their heads?
Ice caps
What do monkeys sing at Christmas?
Jungle bells
Why did Santa have to go to the hospital?
Because of his poor elf
What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations?
Tinselitis
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Frostbite
What did Adam say to his wife the day before Christmas?
It’s Christmas, Eve
What do snowmen wear on their heads?
Ice caps
What do Santa’s little helpers learn at school?
The elf-abet!
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Frostbite
How do snowmen get around?
Riding an icicle
Have any funny jokes you want us to add to the list? Let us know in the comments below, or get in touch!
Related Christmas Facts and Tradition Articles:
- History Of Christmas Crackers: The Ultimate Guide
- 22 Amazing Christmas Tree Facts You Need To Know
- 24 Christmas Facts You Need To Know Now
Christmas Cracker Jokes – Funny & Cheesy Jokes
